He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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