I showed him my bush... on skype.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
