i think my mom watched the whole time
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
