i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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