dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
