Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
