no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Randomize
