You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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