O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
