check it out our google latitudes are spooning
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
