garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
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