I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Randomize
