you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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