24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
