Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
