that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
