these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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