he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
