You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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