she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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