the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize
