That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Randomize
