I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Randomize
