I puked a lego.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
