can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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