Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Randomize
