You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
