Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
