...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Randomize
