I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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