Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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