Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
