sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Randomize
