But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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