I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Randomize
