she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
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