Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Randomize
