it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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