Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Randomize
