Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
