the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
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