are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
