I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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