The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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