No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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