Umm I'm too high to move.
OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
