I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
