i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Randomize
