Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
