BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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